Friday, February 13, 2009

namesake

Coranelle- that will be the name of our baby girl. Coranelle is my grandmother's name. We all called her Grandma Corky, but her full, beautiful name was Coranelle. And we are naming our baby girl after this beloved woman. I thought I would type out some memoirs of my Grandma to explain why we chose the name for our daughter. Surely, any Munson children or grandchildren, as well as the Mullen, Jacksons, and Sullivan out there could add to these memories with their own wonderful memories of Corky. But, these are a few of mine.
A Hello Goodbye Window
As I think of my grandma, whom I adored and miss dearly, I think of her standing in front of her window. I guess you could call it a "hello- goodbye window". She always stood at the living room window of her ranch home in Estes Park and waved goodbye to us as we drove down here steep, dirt driveway from her house nestled into the pine trees and headed home, just a few miles away. You could count on the fact that if you turned around, she'd be there, smiling her wonderful, heart-warming smile and waving. I can picture the living room she was in, with the stone fireplace lined with trinkets from when my Grandpa was in the Navy and traveled the world. There was a huge samurai sword and a copper bed warming gadget that I still don't completely understand. The mantel was full of little figurines of elephants, kids, and shoes all held in with unique bookends and National Geographic magazines. If the TV was on, the Cosby show would be playing and Grandpa might be laughing about something Theo or Olivia was doing on the screen. On the end table, there was a crystal candy jar filled with peppermints, lemon drops and occasionally jelly beans. The house might smell a bit musty, like medicine and geraniums and fermenting orange juice. Maybe Grandma was making meat loaf, potatoes and buttery green beans for supper.
When we ate Sunday dinners with her, she always told me to keep my elbows off the table and she once put a pin cushion full of pins (all face down) on the table under my elbow to remind me to not rest them on the table. Where did she learn her eating etiquette? The rule about not drinking soup from the soup bowl? I wish I knew more about her life and where she lived and what she did. Right now, I just have little window memories into her being. I wish I understood more of what circumstances in her life helped to shape her into the amazing woman she was!
Sometimes, if we were at Grandma's house and she and mom were in another room, my brother and I might try to steal candy from the candy jar. But, that was always difficult because she'd hear the clank of the lid when we tried to secretly put it back on. Then we'd hear, "Who's got their hand in the candy jar" with her super sweet voice. I'd blush and quickly pull my hand away.
We also use to love to ride my grandpa's exercise bike and see who could get those tires to spin the fastest. Some afternoons, we might play out on the rocks behind her house and create forest forts and adventure stories. One time, I buried a time capsule in her yard in one of mom's film canisters. I put in a polly pocket bunny, a quarter, a letter and some other cheap trinkets that I thought depicted who I was and what it was like in the 1990's.
Grandma used to come over to our house to do al of the mending. She and I would do puzzles together on the wobbly coffee table in the living room, or drink hot tea with loads of sugar in it. I liked the tangerine tea and the pink mug with blue poppies on it. Sometimes, when I got out of the shower, Grandma would sit with me on her lap and gently towel dry my hair. I loved having all of her attention and feeling her soft touch.
Grandma came to all of my swim meets, cross country races and track meets. She would be at every choir or band concert and come see every musical I was in. Even when the band played horribly and sounded like screaming elephants, she told me what fun she had and how beautiful we sounded. Never did I hear her criticize me, or any one else in her life. She always knew ways to encourage me and make me feel like I was somehow precious and special.
Grandma loved to smile. I can see her smile in my head and it brings tears to my eyes. She could make anyone feel at ease with her gentle ways and sunny personality. She never cared about having lots of fancy clothes or a large bank account. Sometimes, mom told me the green and stretchy pants she had on were from the 70's. Material objects never seemed to phase Grandma. She just wanted to be in the presence of her family and friends.
My grandma didn't concern herself with her weight or the number on the scale. She ate what she wanted, when she wanted to and wore what was comfortable. She loved chocolate and English Toffee and silly shirts with embroidered flowers around the neckline. Yet, when I picture her, all I can see and remember is radiant beauty. Not the kind you find in People magazine, but real, genuine, true beauty. Grandma had something much deeper than the beauty that our society often seems to worship. Her soul was full of goodness and generosity. I used to watch her take care of my grandpa- who had a severe case of Parkinson's. Her love and devotion to Grandpa forever changed my own views about love and marriage. Grandpa used to shake uncontrollably and was very forgetful. His medication made him so bad that he often couldn’t even recognize his family. Sometimes the meds made him hallucinate about people and things that weren’t really there. He had trouble speaking and walking. It was almost as if he were a 70 year old man who need the attention of a 2 year old. My grandpa was very tall, maybe 6 foot 3 and he had to use a walker to move around. Often, my grandma would have to help him in and out of bed and lift him into chairs and into the bathroom. She had to be SO strong physically and emotionally. Yet, I never saw her so much as grimace, let alone utter a complaint. She still saw him as the man she adored and married years ago, a man that I was never fortunate enough to know. She took care of him with a cheerful attitude. I could see the way that my grandpa would look at Grandma with adoration and appreciation. Even when he couldn’t articulate his speech to thank her, the depth of their love was apparent. My grandma served him until the end. The vow, “in sickness and in health” was powerfully demonstrated in their marriage. I can vividly recall Grandpa grasping grandma’s hand tightly and kissing it with tears in his eyes. Knowing Grandma gave me a timeless message about what love looks like. She was by Grandpa’s side, no matter what obstacles they faced in life, selflessly and humbly giving of her time and energy.
One summer, Grandma went to Glenwood Springs with us for a little weekend getaway. I was relatively young, maybe 10ish. Mom and Steve had gone out for a bikeride and left me to spend the afternoon with Grandma. I got the splendid idea that I wanted to go to the Walmart in town and buy some goggles for the Hot Springs. I truly had no idea how far away the Walmart was, I had just remembered seeing it somewhere along the main strip. So, we set out walking, in Tevas and flip flops- just Grandma and me. It was hot and we walked for a LONG time. I told her it wasn’t far, but it was. REALLY far to walk to. And she was getting nasty blisters and limping before we even got to Walmart. But, she smiled the whole way, telling me stories about her past. When I started feeling really terrible and guilty that I was making her walk so far for my silly goggles, she kept reassuring me that she was having a great time and loved spending the afternoon with me. She was so good natured. By the time we had reached Walmart, purchased the silly goggles and returned to the hotel, we were exhausted, blistered, sweaty and sunburned. But, spending that time with my Grandma was a priceless memory.
I recall the day I drove through the night with Stefan to make it back to her funeral the next morning. Stefan and I spent the drive from Durango to Estes reminiscing about Grandma and how much we loved her. Even at the end, in the hospital, she didn’t want to be a burden to anyone. I recall her apologetically asking me to wet her dry mouth with a moist sponge. Still mustering the energy to smile and softly pat my hand- asking me about my own life and health. When we reached the funeral, the church was packed. People were standing all the way out into the other room. All of the people that she touched were there to celebrate her life and who she was. It was shocking to look around and see the hundreds of people who were going to be missing this lovely woman.
I’ve had to say goodbye to the window of my life that included the priceless experiences and times with my Grandma, but look forward to the new windows that will be opened as we say hello Coranelle Grace Mork in 3 1/2 months. We can only hope that Coranelle exhibits some of the same admirable and wonderful traits that her Great Grandma Corky embodied. We truly cannot think of a better person to name our daughter after and anxiously await her arrival.

2 comments:

nanboyne said...

What a fantastic tribute! I knew your grandmother and she was indeed a wonderful lady. This is why I named each of my children after a loved family member. It leaves such a lasting legacy and it's so nice to explain to your child that they were named after someone who meant so much. Your grandmother would be so touched!

Anonymous said...

After reading about your Grandmother, it is easy to see how you have become the wonderful lady that you are. Coranelle is lucky to have such a heritage. She also has a heritage of another Great-Grandmother, Evelyn Grace Mork. She was a beautiful, intelligent, loving woman with such a loving heart. A wonderful mother and wife. I'm so glad that Coranelle will also have her middle name, in honor of Great-Grandma. Love, Lori