Independence

I walked into the church nursery this morning with Coranelle, as I have done many many times in the last 11 moths. I am the annoying mom who doesn't hand her baby over the gate, but insists on coming in and getting her child settled before sneaking out. I wouldn't be that way, except that for the last gzillion times that I have tried handing her over, she instantly screams and cries. So, I try to sit her down and get her playing so that she is distracted when we leave. Typically, she simply sees the room and freaks out and cries. Even if I sit there with her, she'll fuss and cry and crawl into my lap and hold onto my shirt, somehow pleading with me not to leave her there. Today was different. I walked in with her and she remained calm. We entered the gate together and I put her down. She looked up and me, and crawled away to find a toy. I was stunned. I didn't know what to do, so I looked at Ryan and one of the volunteers who knows Coranelle's typical behavior, and just shrugged and walked out. It felt strange. Wonderful, but so different. This past week, she seems to have gained a new sense of confidence and independence. Grandparents take her and she smiles, her uncle holds her and she doesn't even seem to notice. Last night, she was crawling all over Vann without a single regard to where I was. So, I guess she's growing up. She's not really a baby anymore and that's hard to believe. At times, she'll have pulled up onto something and she'll let go to play with the toy in her hand and stay standing on her own. I hope walking follows soon! With all of her changes, my roles as her mom change and shift too and I am so excited about each new stage that we get to go through together!

Story time

Eating a lemon at the restaurant.
Loving the Beer Gardens with GPS.
The new hairstyle.
A hike in the pack.
Enjoying the view from above.
Eating some turkey by the river.
Happy now that she's not in the pack.
A family picture in Jerome.
So Big!

Once upon a time, a little family of three took a trip to Arizona for a wonderful Spring vacation. There was a mom, a dad, and a beautiful baby girl. They had to take a plane to their destination, and it was the baby's first plane ride. Surprisingly, the baby did pretty well (maybe a B+). She fought sleep (even after a dosage of benedryl,) but finally took a little snooze. The parents were quite pleased with their little one. Once the family arrived in Phoenix, two very nice grandparents picked them up at the airport and took them back to their wonderful home in Cottonwood. The grandparents had brought down a pack n play, a carseat, and all sorts of baby toys and clothes. This made it really easy on the parents. The grandparents even bought all the food for the parents and baby! Upon arrival, the adventures began! The families got to enjoy walks, hikes, bike rides, and warm afternoons at a pristine swimming pool. There were always free and willing babysitters so the parents could enjoy some strolls, bike rides, trips to coffee shops, and swim practice for their upcoming triathlon.
Before going on the trip, the stubborn baby had decided to stop nursing. This was actually really freeing on the vacation for the mother. She did not have to work her schedule or adventures around nursing. She, her husband and the grandpa even went on this crazy 25 mile mountain bike ride while Grandma babysat. It was wonderful for the mom to not have to worry about nursing or the baby taking a bottle while she was gone. The baby could just have her water or juice and eat her applesauce, carrots, mac and cheese, kiwi, strawberries, and turkey. That was good for everyone! Now, many of this story's readers are wondering if the baby is drinking any milk yet. No. No milk yet. The thing is, whenever the mom tricked the baby into drinking milk out of her sippy cup, she'd get mad and reject the sippy cup for days at a time. The mom didn't want to fight the baby on this when the weather was 80 some degrees outside and the baby needed to be hydrated.
Back to our story- a few little highlights from the trip:
The baby started pointing on the trip. She discovered her love for birds and the family said the word "bird" and she'd point.
The baby also started babbling more and more- chatting up a storm of unrecognizable words.
The parents got to go out on a long, beautiful bikeride for the first time in many many months. Though the mom is still sore from falling off her bike multiple times (once into a cactus)- she is proud of her battle wounds and the challenge of a great bikeride with two of her favorite people!
The baby loved the Beer Gardens and was hilarious to watch as she pointed at birds and fed them popcorn while sitting with her GPS.
The baby did wonderfully sleeping in a new place and being off schedule. She was flexible enough to go to a few restaurants and on many walks. The only thing she did not like was being in the backpack for a hike. She got to meet a great grandmother and some other family friends and was quite charming! She was great fun to be around and seemed to grow up in just the few days away.

All in all, the family had a wonderful few days away with the grandparents in the enchanted land of Arizona! When they arrived home to their little place, all of the Mom's tulips were in full bloom and colorfully greeting the family. Although they loved their vacation, it was nice to come home to their cozy home in Colorado.
Hope you are all doing well!

worth

Watching kiddos at an Easter egg hunt.
Vann, Ken and Ryan with their daughters.
Grams with Coranelle before naptime.
Three generations of Munson women.
Coranelle with GPS.
Our little family on Easter. Horay for beautiful weather!
Her own little easter egg hunt.

Does anyone else ever get the blues when they ponder their own worth? Why is it that in our society, one's worth is often closely linked to the amount on their paycheck? Well, what about people like me, who don't get a paycheck. Does that mean we are worthless? Clearly, that's a rhetorical question, and I know that I am not worthless. But, sometimes.... I have to fight against the ideas that I am. You see, I started working when I was 10 years old. No lie. I started babysitting and I was restocking shelves at the local chocolate factory. I have worked ever since. I have nannied, tutored, waited tables in 4 different restaurants, been a barista, done landscaping for the town, and then I taught. So, it is a hard concept to get used to, to not "work" and get paid. When you've done something for 15 years, and then it's completely different, it doesn't come naturally to depend on someone else to provide. This all came about because we got to see Stefan and Rachael and their fun new place last night. They have done some great decorating and gotten some awesome new furniture. I started thinking it would be fun to add a few new touches to our house. I don't know- a head board, some throw pillows that don't have holes in them and smell of breast milk, just little things. But, I cannot help buy them. That's a strange feeling. I have always taken pride in my ability to earn money, save it and then use it. I saved for 4 years in HS so that I could study abroad in England for a year. That's what I am used to. On the other hand, Ryan has his eye on a few things- and he has more than earned them. He's truly a brilliant and incredibly hard working engineer and has earned a few spot bonuses this year and can use those to buy a used road bike and other fun things. Don't get me wrong- it's not as if he won't buy a new headboard for us. He will, and takes great care of us- paying for the necessities as well as fun vacations, clothes, outings and upgrades to our house. But, it would feel great to be able to contribute. (More than $40 per week from my weekly childcare job).

I think I have to just adjust to this life change and remember that I am contributing- just without the benefits of a personal paycheck. My job is to make sure my husband and daughter feel loved and taken care of. So, that means my role today is to play with my girl, feed her snacks, fold her diapers, go unload the dishwasher and vacuum, feed baby more, head out to Sprouts to get some groceries, play some more, feed baby again, make some dinner, play some more, and enjoy this time of my life. Paycheck or no, I am rewarded when my daughter suddenly masters how to drink from a staw, or watching her crawl around while holding onto her hideously ugly pig that she has taken to. I get to pick her up out of the crib after naps when she is still sleepy and cuddly (for about 10 seconds). I am the one who gets to tickle her, watch her learn to clap and practice walking. And really, that makes our 28 year old furniture and bed without a headboard or frame- matter less. Truly, earning a paycheck would not outweigh the joy I get in being with our daughter every day. I would be so so sad to miss out on our daily time together.

So, thanks for reading that rambling of thoughts. I hope you are all doing well!

I think we're done

So, when this new nursing strike came along, I gave Coranelle and ultimatum. I said if she didn't nurse by Thursday night, we'd call it quits. Sure enough, yesterday rolled around and there was no nursing. I offered every 4 hours, as usual. Each time, she would see me lift my shirt and she would pull away and wail, or she would push my chest away from her. Other than her rejection of me, she has been relatively cheerful and good natured. I cannot even tempt her to try sucking anymore. So, I hesitantly say, "we're through". But, when we went to bed last night, I couldn't help feeling a little sad. I have nursed her for the past 10+ months and that part of my life is suddenly over. She will never fall asleep again nursing at night. I wont ever hear her little gulps or have her fiddling around with my necklace while she sucks. I kind of wish I had just one more day, to say good bye to this whole part of our relationship. But, life doesn't tend to work that way, I suppose. My baby girl is growing up. Wow! Although a part of me is sad, another part feels relieved that I don't have to worry about the biting, the hair pulling, or the scheduling anymore. It's bitter sweet, I guess.
Now, we have to work on getting her to take milk. Yes, cows milk. Yes, I know she shouldn't have it until she's one. No, I didn't call me pediatrician. I know that my child won't take formula. We've tried about 7 kinds on multiple occasions. And it seems silly to switch her to formula, only to switch her to milk in a month. She likes her sippy cup and will drink water and juice from it. So far, no luck with the milk. She might take a few sips, but usually makes a horrified face and spits it back out. We just signed up to have Royal Crest Dairy milk delivered. It is all natural and farm fresh, so maybe we can convince her that it's good stuff. I know with my touchy child, it will take time. If any of you have advice, I'd love to hear it.
Despite feeling a little sad that Coranelle is not a baby anymore, I do have to say, I LOVE this age. Ryan and I were talking last night about how much fun it is to see her learn, grow and change every day. She is so cute crawling around, getting into her toys and interacting with people. There are friends of ours who might have just looked at Coranelle and she would erupt into tears. Now, she is crawling over to them and climbing up them! We just love her SO much, I could never express it in words. We are SO thankful for her!
On another note, we booked a vacation last night to go visit friends who "summer" in WI. We are going with another couple and their daughter in August and we are so excited. We will be staying on a lake for a week and the 1 year old girls get to play in the water and together. It will be such a blast to be able to go out on a speed boat again, water ski, swim and relax by a lake with friends! I am thrilled that we have friends to vacation with. All of my vacations growing up were based around water. I went kayaking/rafting, to beaches, and to lakes. They are still my favorite type of getaways, so I am just jumping for joy that we're going to make this work.
Soon we're headed to Arizona for a trip to Cottonwood with my mom and Steve. I am also really looking forward to that. Ryan is ready for a much needed break from work and it will be fun to celebrate the end of tax season with Steve and enjoy family and warm weather.
That's all for now. I need to go get ready to have Mia for the day!
Thanks for reading!
P.S. I hope you have a very happy Easter!